today was fun!

i got up early to help out with breakfast, and then spent the morning helping where i could, since i'm done with school. i did laundry, changed clothes and diapers, swept and mopped, washed dishes, helped make lunch, made a carrot cake for the kids, played, sang, and then helped feed lunch. it was so nice to be in the big house with those kids. around 10 eughenia came over to report that marcos had thrown his shoes off because he was angry, refused to work, got mad that there was no snack, and kept yelling for chuy to leave and me to come back. it broke my heart, because as nice as it is to feel wanted...i'm not teaching anymore! they still have a month of school, and even though i know it will be a change that will take some getting used to, they have to get used to it!
i prayed for smooth changes and peace as i washed the 45th bowl that morning, and then brought over a snack to see how things were going. all the kids were working and had been working, no one was yelling or crying, and things were under control! it was like God was telling me, 'hilary, this is so much bigger than you. you have no idea what i can do.'
i was so relieved and happy to see that when i walked in, i can't even tell you. they did well! everything's going to be okay, because i am not the one in control here!

last day at church! kind of sad...but i'll be back with a team at the end of july and we'll be working at roca de salvacion for a week. pastor cande walked up to me this morning and said, 'bad news, all the airports are closed. you won't be able to go home.' then he suggested i walk or take a vw bus instead. so helpful hahaha

eliseo asked me if i had any requests for songs during worship...so i told him 3 songs i wanted to sing and we sang them all! it was great!

bryan, the drummer's son (and only 3 year old who can say my name perfectly) and eliseo.

i went to see lucy in the hospital on my way back to gabriel house after church. she looks...the same. and sounds the same, and is breathing the same as she was 24 hours ago. i guess i'm just anxious for her to come home. she has pneumonia, though, and from what i've heard that really just takes rest and meds to get better. i told her she needs to come back before i leave! and she blinked, which i'm going to take as a yes :)

adele's here! just for the weekend, but it's great to have her. she went with me to visit lucy in the hospital this morning...she looked so lonely :( there was another baby in the room who made her look HUGE, though. he was a preemie like i've never seen before...could almost fit in my hand without any trouble. probably half the size of lucy. it's crazy that babies that small can still live. it's a miracle, really! i look at lucy sometimes and just can't believe that we are made of all the same bones and muscles and organs. everything about her is so tiny! she's looking better though...slowly getting to be a healthy color and seeming to breathe a little bit easier.

i promised the boys in february that we would get pizza someday...seeing how i'm leaving on thursday i realized i'd better make that happen soon! with adele, hanna, and sidney all here to help i knew this was the perfect time. i was going to take them to the pizza place, but then was thinking about just bringing pizza back to gabriel house because it's so hard for them to get to the bathroom when they're out. but then it's just not as fun to stay here, even if we are eating pizza...and hanna suggested we go to the mission site where she worked a couple summers ago. it was less than 10 minutes away, and no one was there but it had a kitchen and bathrooms, which was perfect. so i didn't tell the boys where we were going or what we were doing; i just told estella so that she would know not to make dinner for them. marcos comes up to me when i get back from the hospital and the first thing he says is, 'are you taking me somewhere?!' i was like what do you mean? and he goes, 'estella told me that you're taking us somewhere and that we're not eating dinner here.' and i said oh, yep! marcos - 'well where are you taking us? what are we doing?' me - 'don't know! you'll just have to wait and see!' marcos - 'hilaryyyyy!' hahahaha it was great.

i think sergio and jose ate 5 pieces of pizza each. granted, it's domino's style, not big new york pieces. but still! we had bananas for dessert, and the best part was they got excited about that! afterwards, we played and played and played. it was an awesome place to be...almost completely kid proof. everything was gated, so they could just run around and we didn't need to worry that they would fall or anything. it was soooo fun! here's a video...

such a great day of school today....
but first a story. alex fell last night as he was going to the bathroom and unfortunately hit the back of his head on his wheelchair and sliced it open. he had to get stitches and will need to take it easy for a few days. he went to the doctor this morning to get a tetanus shot, so he didn't come to school with the rest of the kids. as i was talking to alex, teddy and marcos headed over to the classroom. i ended up talking to him for awhile, and so teddy and marcos were in the classroom alone for a good 5 minutes. maggie was in the office in the same building as our classroom, so it's not like they were completely alone, but there wasn't anyone in the same room with them. i brought tonio and jose over and was slightly nervous, because when teddy and marcos are together, they seem to come up with ideas that aren't my favorite. well they were super excited about something and marcos was jumping down and teddy was wiggling from side to side (his excited dance) while they told me to close my eyes. i kept them half open because i was expecting to see the neighbor's chickens in the room or something like that, and when i opened my eyes, i realized they had set up the classroom - they did the calendar, moved the tables and chairs to where they belonged, and put the schedule up. i was SO PROUD OF THEM. and they were so excited! it was a great teacher moment.

then in preschool, sergio was coloring and holds up his picture, and the marker he was using, and told me what color it was. i was kind of surprised, because he's usually pretty stubborn and it can be hard to work one on one with him...he likes to do his own thing. he'll last for a couple minutes, working on colors, and then nicely asks me to leave him alone so he can keep coloring. well today he told me the colors he was using for like half an hour. i was shocked. he got every color right! it was like he was saving all this up for a big performance on the last day of school or something! i was so happy.

on a not so happy note, lucy went to the doctor today for a checkup and they admitted her :(
they took xrays and she has pneumonia and tons of phlegm in her lungs. it's good that she's there, i guess, but i'm sure they don't have as many people to love on her there as they do here. i'm going to go visit her tomorrow and make sure they're treating her well :)

after school, the kids were playing on the trampoline like always, and i brought some other kids outside to watch. then marcos asked ely if she wanted to get on, and i was like, yes! let's do this! so first we put jaime on, since he's a little more mobile. he laughed hysterically the whole time. it was awesome...marcos's little jumps didn't send jaime more than a couple inches in the air so it was perfect. then we put thelma on, and as long as she could hold on to the side she was loving it. then hanna got ely on there too, and the five of us bounced around for awhile. it was so fun!

i took the best nap today...i think it's the first one i've taken since i got here, and it was amazing. taking care of the baby and teaching full time has wiped me out! this is good practice for the future though hahaha

just got back from taking the boys to church. it was so long tonight, and there was no kid's class like there usually is. the boys did so well though...i was really proud of them. i don't think they could have behaved themselves so well a couple months ago...they're growing up and getting so big :)

hanna and sidney are here!
so exciting, but strange to think that as i'll be gone in a week they're just getting here. great things are going to happen this summer with them here!

i'm typing this one handed as i rock little lucy to sleep...i'm helping angelica with some of the night feedings. it's a big sacrifice on my part - getting to feed and rock to sleep a three month old baby...ha!

i went to the farmer's market thing this afternoon that happens in maneadero every wednesday, looking for clothes that will fit lucy. let me tell you, it was quite the experience. baby clothes are in abundance, but preemie/newborn clothes, not so much. it was a lot of fun though...i got to talk to a lot of people while i explained what and why i was looking for. i told them why she didn't need 3 month clothes, even though she's 3 months, and then i talked about gabriel house...most people had lots of questions and it was a good opportunity to talk more about gabriel house. i tried to buy the clothes off a doll but the man wanted me to buy the doll too, and it was like $3. i got lots of onesies and a couple pairs of pants for 5 pesos apiece...like 40 cents. sweet!

she's here! her name is ana lucia, but i think we're going to call her lucy. she's 3 months old and weighs 4 pounds. she doesn't have cerebral palsy like we thought...she has some respiratory issues but renie is convinced she's going to be perfectly fine. she said she's seen thousands of babies in her 20 years here and this baby doesn't have cerebral palsy - she has breathing issues that will most likely work themselves out as she grows. she was born premature, obviously, and both her parents are drug addicts. but now she's here with us!

that's my hand...and i have really small hands. she seriously looks like a doll.

falling out of her 3-6 month old clothes...

as if leaving in a week wasn't going to be hard enough.

dan and ivey, missionaries at rancho el refugio on the other side of town, stopped by today to see our school and hear about the conafe program. they're starting a school on the ranch next year for kids who can't afford public school and wanted to see what our classes looked like. it was fun to see them and talk about schooling for kids who don't have the chance to go to public school, like kids with disabilities or very little money.

after preschool, we played outside and on the trampoline until dinner. it was so fun...i think the kids are bored a lot of the time, which causes some of them to be lazy/sedentary and others to use their energy to cause problems. most of them have lived here for the majority of their lives, in the same general area with the same toys day in and day out. anything new is exciting to them (just like kids everywhere!) and so it was just great to see everyone playing together, without fighting, and really enjoying themselves. when kids get to be kids, everyone's happy :)

i woke up saturday morning to hear a ruckus up at the big house...the shift that was working is short 3 people so i brought josue and teddy down to my house to try to help the ladies. we made chocolate chip pancakes and juice and played outside...they also helped me clean up the house, do dishes, and hang up laundry :)

later that day, the cake group came. they are awesome...every month, without fail, they come to play with the kids and bring a cake to celebrate the birthdays that month. victor even knows who they are - they get out of their car and victor starts clapping and chanting, 'cake, cake, cake!' well this time they brought more than cake...they brought a trampoline! we used to have one but it was old and worn out so we got rid of it when it became unsafe. this is brand new and the kids had so much fun setting it up. it will be great to use up some of that endless energy that they have!

church was good today...after the service we ate and then everyone starting working around the church, cleaning it up and getting ready to start work on the new building. for lunch they got the fryer out and i heard the word fish, so i figured we were having fish tacos. oh no. how wrong i was. i walk in the kitchen a few minutes later and see a huge bowl of fish. like fresh from the ocean, i'm pretty sure. i saw a tail still flopping around. the guy who was frying them picked up a fish, the whole thing, and dropped it in the oil. he fried it for a couple minutes, put it on a plate, and someone took it. apparently you dig out the edible parts of the fish, put it in a tortilla, and add whatever you want - rice, tomato, onion, salsa, etc. fish tacos, yes. slightly horrifying to see the eyes staring back at you as you pick around its bones and insides, also yes.

i skyped with my cousin's ap spanish class in tennessee this morning...all in spanish! that was pretty fun. they had no idea what life was like for people with disabilities down here...they were shocked to hear that kids in wheelchairs aren't welcome in the public schools. it was great to be able to share some more info with them and hear their spanish!

school was good...one more day of full time teaching. so crazy.

i took the boys to church tonight and josue fell asleep in my arms...i love when kids fall asleep in my arms :)
tonio was so mad because he wanted to go to the kid's class but didn't get to...he was throwing a fit in front of the entire church. he eventually calmed down and then got really into the sermon. it was awesome. he was signing back to me all the bible stories the pastor was telling, and some of the stories he was preaching about...it was pretty neat.
before we started the drive home, angelica asked sergio to pray like we always do before we drive anywhere. he can be really hard to understand sometimes, and most of us pick up a couple words out of every sentence he says. anyways, he prayed, and joshua, angelica's son, repeated back what he was saying, word for word. he did it perfectly, too...i understood everything sergio said. after, joshua was like, 'wow, i don't know how i did that but i understood every word he said.' angelica told him it was the holy spirit and everyone was just amazed. it was really cool!
we had a lot of fun on the car ride home, too. they were selling sandwiches and rice milk after the service to raise money for the church, and angelica bought a sandwich and milk for each kid. before we were out of the driveway sergio had downed his milk and was singing at the top of his lungs, bouncing along in his seat. he's so funny when he gets riled up...

i LOVE this picture. josue looks adorable, and then if you look at ruben, he's in the process of throwing/kicking sand and making the funniest face. what a rascal...

no baby today :/
i kind of figured she wasn't going to come, so i tried not to get my hopes up. lots of times we hear a new kid is coming and it's days or even weeks before they actually get here. i hope she comes soon!

today was fun after school...becky and i hung out with the kids and they were all just messing around...we were all together and everyone was having fun. no fights, no injuries, no one was mad or upset...it felt like a big family spending an afternoon together. that was before pilar and marcos smacked heads, ivonne wet through her diaper, sergio got mad at teddy for sitting too close to him, and lidia started crying because of all the noise. hahahaha! just a day in the life.

then we all went to the kitchen for dinner, where we had fish tacos. how can it be a bad day when it's fish tacos for dinner? yum :)

we finally had a sunny day! it's been 3 solid days of clouds, clouds, clouds. it was sooo nice. the kids were happier, i was in a better mood, and everyone walked (or wheeled) with just a little more spring in their steps.

sergio has two toys that he is never, ever without...one is woody from toy story, and blanco, his horse. blanco has seen better days...he lost his saddle a couple weeks ago and his stuffing has been poking out ever since. pilar got her hands on him and ripped out all his stuffing a couple days ago, and sergio was devastated. renie saw, took blanco to her house, and came back a few hours later with him. it was AMAZING. she restuffed him, reattached the saddle with a new blanket on top of it, added eyes and a tail (they had worn off and fell off). he was so happy.

joanna stopped by today with her baby, who turned a month old today. i got to hold him for awhile...he is precious! so stinkin cute.

what a day.

brief summary:
- another woman quit
- ripping up the calendar
- last day of ventana
- new girl
- i have a lot to learn from tonio and jose
- i'm going to be a mom in 2 days!

so. another woman walked out this morning, which has been the trend recently. becky covered for her instead of helping out with school, and our maintenance men covered shifts as well so that all the kids were being cared for. (they're perfectly capable and have done it before...but it still catches me off guard to see don lupe, the guy who built the boys' new house, feeding the babies...) it's so sad though, because this woman was awesome with the kids. just awesome. she loved them so much and it was really hard for her to leave, but it's also really hard to work here. i guess everything combined with the unsteady pay was too much.

at school this morning we were talking about the date, like we always do, and i asked the kids how many days until hanna and sidney come, and then how many until i leave. i want them to be prepared for both things...it's going to be different when i'm not here everyday and i want them to understand that and not have it come as a shock. anyways...jose said, 'no, no don't leave.' and teddy said, 'why do you have to leave? where are you going?' (we go through this EVERYDAY. sometimes i think they do it just to waste time haha) we talked about it for a minute and then marcos said, 'hey, if i take your name off of the calendar and rip it up, then you won't be able to leave!' everyone seemed to think it was a good idea. i explained that i already had a plane ticket and that i would see them in august...and then we read amelia bedelia together for some good laughs.
today was the last day that ventana, a group that has been coming almost every monday since i got here, came to visit. the students that have interned with them for a year arrived in august, like me, and are leaving in 3 weeks, like me. it's been fun to get to know them, and they love love love to be with the kids. they were so sad to leave today...but that means good things have happened, so we can rejoice in that.

we have a new girl! her name is kimberly michelle, and she's from tijuana. she reminds me a lot of betzy. she has cerebral palsy and other than smiling or crying, isn't very responsive. her arms and legs are horrible looking. they're naturally like you see in the picture...they can't be stretched any farther than a few inches. she's so skinny and we think she had lice, which is why she hardly has any hair. she's 8...kimberly with angelica, meeting ely

imagine having your arms and legs like that and not being able to move them...

tonio and jose almost made me cry today. they had been waiting and waiting to meet kimberly, so when i brought her out they ran up to her to say hi. let me just paint this picture for you - the water has been off all day, so we couldn't bathe her. she smelled horrible...just because her teeth hadn't been brushed in who knows how long, but it was a strong and pungent smell. i was talking to jose and i looked down and tonio was giving her a kiss on the cheek. he shook her bird claw hand without a second guess and jose patted her legs, trying to help her put them the right way. they were so gentle with her, and had so much love to give her. instantly! we went to go feed her, and tonio told me i should pray before she ate. i asked him to, and he laid a hand right on her chest and signed a prayer with her. she has a jogging stroller because her body won't fit in a wheelchair, and jose was trying to fix the cover because part of it was hanging loose...they are such sweet boys. i wish you could have seen their faces when they were with her.

angelica walked out of the office before kimberly got here and said, 'hilary, you're going to be a mom!' i figured she was talking about kimberly coming and i was like, yeah, sweet, can't wait to meet her! and she goes, 'i know, she'll be here on wednesday, and she's 3 months old! start thinking of names!' WHAT. there's a baby coming from mexicali on wednesday who still doesn't have a name. at dinner angelica was telling everyone that i'm going to be a mom...tonio and alex were so excited and kept signing pregnant and mom. i had to explain the situation a couple times hahaha. the last baby that was here was teddy's brother and he left in the beginning of september. we have no baby clothes so guess what i'm going to do tomorrow...! she might even get to stay down here with me...there are no beds in the baby room. i can hardly contain myself.
and i'm not thinking about the fact that i'll be here for less than 3 weeks.

some beanbag chairs were donated, and look at these cuties i found lounging around!

i learned how to make tortillas and sopes today! i've been wanting someone to teach me for a long time, so i went to juanita's house...she lives just down the street and used to work at gabriel house. now she's ted and renie's housekeeper. she's a sweet older woman and an awesome cook. her legs have been hurting her a lot lately, to the point where it takes her minutes to get up or sit down. she was telling me how she prays once a day, when she gets up in the morning. awhile ago she had a dream where she was at a doctor's office. she didn't see his face, but he handed her a prescription for the pain in her legs. in her dream she read it, and it said pray three times a day. since then, she's prayed three times a day, and jumped out of her chair to show me how her legs don't hurt her anymore. nice!

i'm off to the beach with some people from church to teach them how to make s'mores. they've never heard of them here...unbelievable!

on the off chance that you're having a bad day, let this beautiful face cheer you up :)


not much to report on today...
i'm starting to plan my transition out of school, which is kind of weird. i don't want to be here, teaching full time and then boom! gone. i think chuy and i will do like a half and half thing for a week, where he'll teach about half the time and i'll teach the other half, and then my last monday through wednesday i'll spend with the kids in the big house (who i feel like i haven't seen AT ALL lately!).
we made earrings during arts and crafts today...alex, tonio, and jose have a seriously good sense of style. marcos got bored in about 2 seconds and wanted to play with the tools, and teddy couldn't decide on what beads to use. quite a circus, but lots of fun nonetheless.

this morning was great. the kids worked so hard and we got so much done. i was super proud of them. preschool is going really well with becky, too. she's awesome with the kids and they love her.
just got back from eliseo's...we went to this coffee place that's inside an old mansion and watched videos of groups that used to come work at roca de salvacion. they were hilarious...and now i'm tired and off to bed!

today was cool...becky will be the aide once i leave and chuy will be the main teacher again, so she starting today she'll be shadowing/observing/picking up as much as she can to be able to make a smooth transition when i leave. she worked in a day care for awhile so she's great with the preschoolers, which is an area i've always felt like i could use help in. it's great to have her there too because she has the kids' best interests in mind and truly wants to help them, which is always a good thing.

i skyped with two college friends tonight that i haven't talked to in forever. they both are engaged - rachele's getting married in june, and katie in october. i am so so so excited for them! and the weddings are going to be so great with everyone there. gahh!!

the car people came! it was crazy. the whole cul de sac was full of old cars, and some of them were crazy. they bounced up and down, went up on 3 wheels...fun stuff. they were some pretty rough looking guys, and it was interesting to watch them as our kids came out. it was a beautiful picture after awhile though...everyone hanging out together, talking about cars!

teddy making the car go up and down...

we took marcos, ruben, pilar, nene, josue, and victor to the circus tonight. kind of glad to be done with that haha. they all loved it, minus a couple minutes at the beginning of every show. the people there were so nice and hospitable...tonight they just waved us in and let us do our thing, front and center. i'm happy we got to take so many kids, though...i feel like every kid should get to go to the circus at least once in their life.

miss nene! she would go from being scared and burying her face in my shoulder to making me clap with her and yelling 'BRAVO!' at the top of her lungs. it's never a dull moment with this girl!

we went to the circus tonight! alex, tonio, teddy, sergio, jaime, becky, and ted and renie's daughters were there. it was fun. becky and i tried to warn them that the music was really loud, and there were some scary parts. teddy and tonio got really serious and started asking questions like, but it's still safe, right? i'm still going. are you still going? i'm going. i'm not scared.
well the music started and tonio made a mad dash for the exit...alex jumped a foot out of his chair and teddy got this terrified look on his face. sergio just laughed hysterically, and jaime didn't understand what was going on. after a couple minutes outside tonio was fine and came back in. teddy loved it and laughed hysterically the whole time. alex and tonio weren't quite sure what to make of it, but by the end they decided they had a great time. a success!

take number 25 of the night...he never actually looks at the camera. but I LOVE THIS CHILD. sometimes it's hard for me to play with him because i have to realize that one day, very soon, i won't be able to walk out of my apartment and see his little fingers reach for the window as i walk by...or hear him say mama when he sees me...or watch him roll as fast as he can to get to me when i come into the room...ahhh.

amazed at something.

so excited!

front row seats!

tomorrow after church the classic car guy is (FINALLY) coming! then we're taking nene, pilar, josue, ruben, marcos, and jose to the circus. it will be another fun day!

a group from reality church that came awhile ago painted this sign...i don't think i've posted it yet. it's so springy!

today was the first day of school since friday...it was a little rough for marcos, but the rest of the kids did pretty well.
it looks like becky will be continuing with school once i leave, which will be awesome. she's going to start shadowing me on monday...i'm excited that someone who wants to help the kids will be around when i leave.
today for snack we had pretzels, which people don't eat here. i haven't seen them in any store, ever. the kids were asking what they were, and i explained that they don't have a spanish name because no one really eats them, so i just called them crackers. marcos looks at them for awhile, and very profoundly says, they're hearts. of salt. salt hearts. hahaha he cracks me up!

i just got really sad to leave this place.

i worked on lesson plans and did random things around the apartment all day. literally...i got up and got to work, stopping to eat and bake banana bread hahaa. i didn't see any of the kids all day, and after dinner i went down the street to buy newspapers for something we're doing in class tomorrow.
on my way back, i was walking down to my house when pilar yells my name and runs toward me, her arms wide open. i gave her a hug and then she ran back to keep playing. and then i passed the boys' room where jaime sleeps right next to the window. i said hi to him and he reached his hand out to touch mine through the window screen and started laughing. well of course i had to go in and play with him for a little bit, so i did, but it was so hard to not cry. daaang. i didn't think i would be like this. hopefully the month i have left will help me get more and more used to the idea...

eliseo and i went back to el mirador tonight...but this time with cameras. so pretty. this is level with the ocean, and then later we drove up...

...to see the city from above!

later at night. i had mole for the first time tonight at with eliseo's family...it's a sauce that goes over chicken that's sweet and spicy at the same time. not bad; it had a nice kick!

guess where we went tonight...THE CIRCUS! first time the sisters had ever been...it was so awesome.

we were the first ones in and got to watch them set up. they put us in the very front row! the guy in charge came by while we were waiting and goes, 'where are the rest of the kids?' i explained how they didn't fit in the van, but that we'd be back later in the week with more. he was so nice and hospitable...he said anytime, whenever, just come, and bring everyone!

ely laughed the whole time. no joke. here's a video. it was awesome...i think i watched her more than the circus!

he's from the dr!

so you may remember waaaay back in october becky and i went to church with lerma, a woman who works at gabriel house. today we went back to the same place, but this time with roca de salvacion for a kid's day celebration (i'm telling you...this day is a big deal here. crazy that it doesn't even exist in the states!). cande and his family and a couple other families camped out the night before, and the rest of us got there this morning. abram decided he wanted to ride his bike, so whenever he wasn't holding on to the back of the truck the rest of us were in, he was jumping across rivers and careening down rocky hills while we watched and gave him helpful tips (that way! watch out for the rock! water up ahead! i think he went faster just to get away from the peanut gallery hahaha)

there was a tire swing...what was i supposed to do? look at it?

a bunch of us climbed up this mountain! eliseo and i are in the middle, and higher up is rosario, ana, jonathan, and josue. sandals were not the best choice. but such a beautiful view up top!

worship in the park/valley/clearing...whatever you want to call it! it was great to be with people from church in a place other than, well, church. lots of good conversation, friends, and sun makes for an awesome, joy filled day. woo hoo!

so saturday we took the kids to a party at church (the one we go to on thursday nights). it was for kid's day, so there was a bouncy castle, a pinata, food, and lots of people. the church is also an alcohol/drug rehab center (for people who are already clean, so i guess it's kind of a halfway house?) the guys are wonderful and help so much with the kids we bring. they also have some animals...pigs, chickens, and ducks, and nene and i spent most of the day with the pigs. at first she wasn't sure if she liked them - in this picture she's saying no, no! but then they grew on eacho ther and she was enthralled by the way it was eating...

love.this.face.

well, it's a party, so obviously oscar the grouch and the doctor that stands outside of all the pharmacies in mexico are going to come...

ruben found a babysitter! he loved her, she took such good care of him (and he LISTENED to her)...a match made in heaven.