teddy's masterpiece.

more pictures from this weekend!

well, i'm in the states! this will be my last post until i'm back at gabriel house in january.

i'll post pictures from this weekend later today.

friday we had our last-day-of-school-before-christmas-vacation party. we read the christmas story from a kid's bible. there was a pinata filled with apples, oranges, and candy (the fruit is tradition, i promise!) and spent the morning together celebrating. we did the pinata in front of the big house, so all the kids came outside and everyone got a chance to break that thing open.

since the tijuana brigada was cancelled, the group that was planning to help there ended up spending the whole weekend at gabriel house, instead of just sunday morning. they got to gh on friday night, and then spent saturday morning working on the boys' house and playing with the kids.

i went into to town to try and convince rocio to spend the weekend at gabriel house (she was going to come to the brigada) and she came back with me! she spent a lot of time on the computer :) but was up at the big house playing with the kids a bit.

the group painted the boys' new room - it's beautiful. they did a decoration around each window and door and wrote the fruits of the spirit in spanish. really fun, bright colors, and something that will always be nice to look at, whether the boys are 12 or 25.

rocio and i went to the movies on saturday night which was fun. i get the feeling she's pretty lonely since she lives alone and has school 2 days a week, so it was great to just be out with her. on the way there we were talking about how i saw tuinki and i was asking if she knew if he was back on drugs or not. she said she didn't know, and then i really wanted to ask her why she never took drugs. it would have been so easy for her to do. so i told her she didn't have to say anything if she didn't want to, but i asked her why she had never taken drugs. she told me right away that after seeing what it did to her family - almost everyone has or is on drugs - there's no way she's going to do that to herself. she's scared of what could happen and she has seen how it ruins lives. i told her i thought it was so sad that she had to have those people be her family, but so powerful that she is able to decide for herself what she will and will not do. what a life, man.

sunday morning was the christmas party. it was awesome. all the kids were in the kitchen, and we decorated the christmas tree, hung up stockings, made ornaments with each kids' picture, and listened to christmas carols. then we had a service with worship, a christmas drama, and another craft. it was great for the kids to watch and be a part of. then we decorated christmas cookies! it was hilarious. teddy had frosting lathered on his cookie that was thicker than the actual cookie. the boys had frosting all over their faces, they kept trying to sneak extra cookies, and i caught alex licking a spoon that was piled with frosting. i love moments like that...when they do stuff that they shouldn't really be doing but are just being kids.

then we made christmas dinner...we had 4 turkeys, mashed potatoes, gravy, and a salad. it was great! i helped in the kitchen which was a lot of fun; i don't usually get to do that. the kids like the food a lot and it was a nice change from hamburger meat and hot dogs :)

overall, a great way to head out. it's hard to believe i won't be back for 3 weeks, but it will be a healthy and refreshing break, i'm sure. i'm at krista's house (my college roommate) in san diego and will head to chicago for a wedding later this week. woo hoo! merry christmas!

well, the brigada in tijuana is canceled. there's a lot of rain predicted all weekend, and they're thinking that people won't come out if it's raining. it's a bummer, but now the team that was going to tijuana will be here at gabriel house all weekend. they're going to work on the boys' new house and get stuff set up for the christmas party on sunday. all of the workers' kids will be invited, too, which should be a lot of fun. i'm excited!

what a day. we were in class (finally) when this really loud airplane flew by. everyone turned to look and it was so close i unconsciously ducked! it turned out to be a crop duster that was spraying the fields right behind gabriel house, and it was this bright orange plane painted like a tiger, or shark, or something with huge teeth. well i'm sorry but class was put on hold just for a little bit...it was so cool. the kids loved it. the guy flew right over us a couple times; i'm sure he could see us. it was sweet.

i was cleaning out my drawers and getting rid of clothes that i don't need/want (oops. i brought too many clothes. big surprise. ) and angelica said i could give some of my clothes to the boys. i had a namesake shirt (sorry don, but it's not even your band's name anymore) that i gave to sergio, and he was so precious. remember that he can be really hard to understand when he says multisyllabic words, and he's happy 96% of the time. so i told him i was giving him the shirt and he gets this huge smile on his face and goes, wow! for me? thank you hilary!
i've never heard him talk like that before! it was so clear, and so genuine. and it was an old shirt. he got right to work folding it and putting it in his drawer. so sweet. love that kid.

so i went downtown to get a few things before i leave, and i made a tamale stop at a new place paco told me about. they were unbelievably delicious (of course), but as i was standing there and looked at the guy who was working, i thought he looked really similar to twinkie, one of our friends from rocio's neighborhood (17 de abril). i kept staring at him, because i just could not figure out if it was him. he was pretty skinny and taller than i remembered...but i hadn't seen him since april. i didn't want to make an even bigger fool of myself and start talking to him if it wasn't twinkie, but i was like, i cannot let this pass me by. i asked him if he was twinkie and he smiles and goes, yeah. i told him i was lourdes' friend and he goes yeah you're hilary, right? lourdes told me you were going to be here.
oh my GOSH. let me tell you just how miraculous this is. we saw him in april when we were here for barnabas. then when we were back in august he wasn't around. he's been on and off drugs, in and out of the states and rehab centers, and just kind of bouncing around. i talked to him for awhile - he's back living in 17 de abril and seems to be doing pretty well. i didn't want to ask too much, but he's got a job and looks pretty healthy. it was just unbelievable. of all the flipping tamale places in ensenada...of all then nights he could be working...of the 5 times i've been walking downtown in the past 4 months...wow. God is so good.

today was a day of clean up and repairing after the disaster yesterday. not too much more rain, but the effects were everywhere. no classes again, and i worked in the boys house. it was fun to hang out with them all day...they're great kids. lots to do...rocio's spending the night on thursday and then we're going to tijuana for the health fair, and after our christmas party on sunday i'm headed to the states. woosh!

rain. torrential, incessant, and forceful rain.
that was yesterday. the skies opened up and they stayed open until the power went out at 5pm...
the tar paper came off the roof of the boys' house, we lost the tarp that covers our classroom, the street in front of gabriel house is a giant puddle, and every time we went to the big house to eat i covered the boys, one by one, in my raincoat and sprinted through the puddles and mud to the kitchen. gahh.
ophelia didn't come to work yesterday so i worked with the boys, and i'm working with them again today. we didn't have school yesterday and i don't think we will today because there's a giant puddle where we used to have a classroom and it's dripping on every single table. whew! it was a fun rainy day, though. i told the boys how whenever i was stuck inside on a rainy day my mom would bring out a game or toy or something that she was saving for a rainy day. i brought up a big bag of craft stuff and we had fun making a mess. hopefully the rain is done and the power stays on!

the pastor's dinner on friday night was a lot of fun. paco and i were the greeters and i saw a lot of familiar faces (including eliseo and his mom) which was exciting! it was at the riviera, which is the huge fancy building facing the water that we always drive by but never dream about being in hahaha. it looked like a wedding - super fancy - with seat covers and everything. monica from kids camp made the food so of course it was delicious, just a little late getting to us. we were all standing outside waiting for the car to come and al and rosa were stalling...i have never seen food move so fast as when monica was in charge and the van pulled up. if we weren't it such a hurry it would have been funny. ok actually it was funny while it was happening - we were all laughing as we were running up and down the hallways with the food. al jr and his friend gary played some beautiful classical guitar pieces, and then later al sr. SANG! it was sweet. i met eddie, the director of mexico outreach. he was so nice and it was great to finally get to know him.

saturday we had class in the morning and then went with rocio. it was good to see her...it's been awhile. she's doing well and is coming to the brigada with me on friday and saturday this week. she's so funny - this girl is so independent and does so much on her own, but she doesn't want to take a micro to maneadero. i have to meet her halfway there! oh well.

church was fun today - we had a party to celebrate the graduates of the different classes. some people studied a book called nuevos principios, and another class was on liderazgo con proposito, a book by rick warren. they really take studying seriously in church...they kept saying it's not enough to just show up every sunday, it's not enough to just read your bible, it's not enough to just pray...christians have to keep diving deeper.

i learned how to make arroz con leche this weekend! very dangerous. rice, whole milk, sugar, and cinnamon. glad i don't have a dress i have to fit into anytime soon. oh wait...i'm in a wedding in 2 weeks...

well, blanca left us this week. her parents moved farther south and wanted to take her with them. sad that she's gone but it's good, too...she would cry a lot and we thought it was because she missed being with her parents.

work continues with the boys' new house...the hope is that by christmas they'll be all moved in. i hope that happens! it will be so nice to move school inside. but hey, at least it's not snowing here!

hard to believe i'll be leaving in about a week. this is my last weekend at church because next week i'm going to tijuana. mexican medical is having a brigada - a health fair - and rocio's coming too. mexmed oversees a lot of missions, and almost all of them are medical - doctors, clinics, stuff like that. gabriel house is their black sheep :) so anyways, i'm excited to be part of this brigada.

tomorrow is the christmas dinner that al and rosa are hosting. i've learned not to ask questions because i either won't exactly understand the answer or the answer doesn't help me understand anything better...so little by little i'm realizing that this dinner is a big deal (i think). it's downtown at the riviera and we're supposed to be on our best behavior hahaha

on our big wall calendar today we marked the day of our christmas party, the days when becky and hanna are coming back, and christmas day. what an exciting month we are in!

jose hung around while we were having preschool today...usually he's in the big house with the rest of the boys. it was the most precious thing - he and josue had this long conversation that i got to watch. neither of them can talk, but jose uses some sign language and josue will talk to you for hours if you let him; it's just really hard to understand most of what he says. anyways, josue was going on and on and jose was so sweet - paying attention, signing back, laughing, smiling...it was awesome. sometimes you don't need a voice to have a friend!

pretty good day of school today. lots of kids made good choices. when i went down to get the kids for school, marcos was already punished. not a good way to start the day. i talked to him before we got to school about how he could keep going, having a very bad 'muy mal' day, or he could change his actions and his attitude and have a really good day. we talked about how he's the only one that can made that happen. as much as i want to, or someone else might want to, we can't. it's his choice and his day that will change. he had a pretty good day after that. his temper is SO short...it's almost like a game. you just never know when he's going to blow. i've gotten better at reading him, though, so we can avoid the tantrums. eek.

it's frustrating sometimes to work on big behavior things like this when i know he just doesn't get it. but i think little by little we're making progress.

while i was waiting for chuy to plan for tomorrow, i was playing with the boys and found a nemo baby costume. sergio put it on but it on but it didn't fit over his butt so then teddy put it on...sooo funny.

so apparently it's strawberry season in mexico...i got a big bag of them for like 2 bucks. score!
we got some beautiful standing frames donated. they're literally a frame for standing - the kids are strapped into it while laying down, and then we push the frame into an upright position and they're 'standing.' they have desk like surfaces, too, so the kids can have a book or a toy with them. they're really cool and the ones we just got are brand new and soooo nice. we're really anxious for the new house to be done so the boys can move there and we can move school inside as well as have a room for physical therapy. it seems like it's taking forever, but really it's going pretty fast. hopefully before christmas!

oh gosh...where to even begin.



friday was GREAT. the kids were so good in school and we had a lot of fun. marcos has a tough time paying attention, and it's hard to keep him on task when there's two of us, let alone when i'm alone. anyways, he was angry that i asked him to sit in the circle with us and pouting in a corner when we started reading where the wild things are (in spanish - thanks hanna!). by the 3nd page, he was down on the floor, as close as he could get to the book, reading along with us. it was great.
adele was here all weekend and that was super fun. it's so cool - she hardly speaks any spanish. but her heart is so invested in this place and these kids and they know that. they LOVE her. love her! it's really cool to watch her interact and love on the kids.

i went to church friday night but came back saturday morning because adele was here and also the concert was saturday night. i got back in time for lunch and had one of the best days i've had yet. i don't really know why...it was just so fun with the kids. the boys stayed in the big house after lunch and played with the kids who weren't taking naps in the big house. it rained HARD all day so everyone was in a rainy day kind of mood...we made cookies together, watched camp rock (the jonas brothers movie hahaha) and sang and danced to all the songs, and just had a great but relaxing day.

since it was raining and really cold we didn't take any kids to the concert with us, but it was awesome. right when we walked in there was a wall with letters from each kid at gabriel house to santa, with a picture and info about his or her disability and a christmas wish. a funeral home downtown adopted us and put on this whole concert, with all the proceeds going to gabriel house. the concert was unbelievable. the guitar players were soooo talented...never missed a note, never were off key. really cool.



church today...this friday the young adults in church are going to help serve at a dinner that al and rosa do every year to thank the pastors they work with. it's a big deal, super formal, and they're expecting about 80 couples. i'm excited! except i have to find black pants. eek.

church!

the benefit concert for gabriel house is tomorrow night...teddy and sergio are coming with us to represent the kiddies. can't wait!

keep reading to figure out why i don't actually know this woman's real name...

today was such a blessing.
it started out pretty rough. yesterday wasn't that good of a day at school, and i was trying very hard to be joyful and digging deep into my reserves of patience. i was also bummed that i wasn't with family on thanksgiving - that no one here was even celebrating thanksgiving (not their fault - it's not a mexican holiday hahaha)
we were 15 minutes into the school day when angelica told me to call renie right away...i knew that either really good or really bad. i call her up and she goes, 'no classes, hilary, it's thanksgiving. come over and you're going to learn how to make corn tortillas and flor de calabaza quesadillas, and then we're going out for thanksgiving dinner.' i started CRYING. it was so wonderful!
i went over to her house and watched her neighbor make corn tortillas and then made a few myself, after dropping the first one on the floor as i was trying to slap it around as the mexicans do so effortlessly. oops. calabaza is a squash, and it was this lettuce looking vegetable, cheese, peppers, and onions in the homemade tortillas. deeeelicious.

i got back to the big house and was playing with the kids when a ywam group showed up, and no one was really around so i showed them around and talked to them. it was SO FUN. i love welcoming the groups...even just having conversations in english is awesome! they were such a blessing. i was low on energy and a teeny bit homesick, and they were just full of life and love.

then ted, irene, their two daughters ali and ani, kim, and her daughter chloe and i went to baja mama's for dinner. it's this funky restaurant that's really an extension of baja mama's house (yes, there actually is a baja mama). it's right on the beach on the way to la boufadora in the middle of nowhere, but a super fun, overwhelming, and colorful dining room. it was an interesting place to be - full of super rich americans having thanksgiving where their second (or third) homes are, and then the motley crue from gabriel house! it was great, though. baja mama has given us leftover turkeys the past couple years for the kids. she is quite the character...we walked in and she had this huge yellow curtainy dress on, no more than 4 teeth, and was smoking under a sign that said please no smoking. ha!
dinner was exactly what it should be...turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, yams, corn, and pumpkin pie. unbelievable. such a great surprise, and a great day!

please help!

we are in desperate need of hand braces for a lot of the kids in the big house. since they don't use their hands, all of their fingers are very stiff, and their thumbs especially are tight against their palms. if they don't have braces, their thumbs will atrophy like teddy's, rendering them almost completely useless. even small rollerblade wrist braces would work.

if you happen to find some, please send them to:
hilary holbrook - mexican medical ministries
7850 lester ave
lemon grove, ca 91945

thank you! the kids will thank you too, when they are able to move their fingers for the rest of their lives!

we had to leave for the hospital at 6:30am this morning, so i was up in the big house way earlier than usual. ruben, one of the kids with down's syndrome, was sleeping when i walked in. he woke up as i was talking to the ladies, stands up, and reaches his arms out for a hug! it was so precious because it just was, but also because yesterday he and i had a tough day together. he was having a hard time following directions and i was working very hard to be patient with him...it was a nice way to start the day :)

there was a group here from washington state for the afternoon! they came to tijuana to build houses, but had visited a church in eastern wa earlier this year, the same sunday that the high school team that happened to do a mission to gabriel house happened to be reporting back to the congregation. when the group that came today found out how far ensenada was from tijuana, they scheduled a visit! it was actually a family - 3 kids, a spouse, and the parents. such a cool idea, and they were so great. really interested in the place and what we're doing. i got to talk to them for awhile, which was really good. conversations in english don't happen that much with me here! the daughter in law was crying as she was holding eymi, and i was like yes! i love when they cry! it means something is happening...

marisol lost a tooth today and was SO excited...apparently the tooth fairy doesn't exist in mexico. instead, a mouse comes in the night and takes the tooth, leaving candy or money in its place.
off to the hospital with martin tomorrow...some sick kids and some who need meds. it's scary when the weather gets colder here because a lot of the kids have nasty coughs that make me worry about their ability to breathe. then i realize that i worry too much.
talked to the fam AND meghan for a long time...woo hoo! i love skype.

friday was awesome. we dressed the kids up and paraded around for awhile. it was the most dysfunctional parade i've ever been a part of, but it was beautiful. our sign kept falling apart, everyone wanted a turn pushing the wheelchairs, no one understood that the person with the flag was supposed to lead the parade, marisol's baby doll kept falling out of its blanket, josue wanted to take the parade in a different direction, and naynay's skirt would NOT stay up. i was laughing the whole time. i wish you could have been here with me...

we were done with the festivities by 10ish and chuy said no school after that, so finally got to play with the kids at the big house! i haven't been able to spend the day with them in soooo long. we took all the kids outside and i took a bunch of them out of their chairs and we played on the carpeted area outside. it was so fun. it's such a different dynamic with the kids in the big house but still so much fun.

a group from california was at church this weekend, working on the new room. no one in that group speaks spanish - for most of them, english is their second language and mandarin is their first. they have mandarin-english bibles...it's so cool. i got to translate a lot for them and that was fun.
al and rosa were back in church - they've both been gone for awhile. rosa was in el salvador for the past couple weeks, helping her 94 year old aunt find a nursing home. her aunt refused to go to a nursing home even though they found one that was perfect, but the day before rosa left to come home she found a live in caretaker for her aunt. perfect!
martha taught me how to make ceviche de soya yesterday. she's intent on teaching me how to cook like a mexican. it's been her goal since i got here....it started with learning how to correctly chop cilantro and now we're working on actual meals. i consider this an accomplishment. ceviche is something i never thought i'd like but it's really not that bad. it's made with dry soy, or soy something...like soy crumbles. i don't know. and then cucumbers, tomato, onions, tuna, cilantro, tomato juice, lime juice, and salt. you eat it with chile on tostados. simple. yummy.

we sang a great song in church today...it's called te vengo a bendecir a ti.
these are the words:
it's more than a song, it's more than words
it's my heart surrendered to you
it's the best of me that i give you
a song isn't enough

what you ask me, i want to give you
i don't come to ask, i don't come looking for something
i just come to give you my offering of love
today i want to touch your faithful heart
and give you thanks my Lord
today i come to bless you

it's prettier in spanish, but still...you get the idea.

church for the weekend. adios!

so i was wheeling jose to the kitchen today for lunch, and i had my hands full of stuff from school. we were at the door where there's a little step, and i turned around for a second to talk to someone, figuring he would get himself up like he usually does. the next thing i know, i hear a thump and see him on the ground...he tipped right over backwards! i looked down in horror, expecting to see him crying or at least in pain, but he was LAUGHING. laughing! and then he points at me and shakes his finger, which means - it was your fault! laughing hysterically the whole time...hahahaha. love that kid.

tons of mail came today! hanna's friends for life group made us pilgrim hats and indian headbands and some sweet cards, and becky sent us postcards and letters. we talked about thanksgiving but i'm not quite sure we all understand what that is yet...anyhow, the kids loved all of their mail :)




i went to church tonight with alex, jose, and tonio! it was so fun! to see the world outside of gabriel house through their eyes...something they don't see very often...was so interesting. the micros just blew their minds because they're so big. they had a great time at church. they all got really into the service, and every time the pastor started yelling alex would throw his hands up in the air, shaking his fists in agreement. he had his bible that he kept open the whole time and read along with us. so cool to be able to share that with them.

we had a baby shower for marisol today! it's always fun to hang out with the ladies who work here in a low stress situation...the party was during naptime so most of the kids were sleeping. they played this game where you guess how big her belly is in squares of toilet paper and then measure her...so funny. she's due in less than a month!
i'm considering starting a collection of baby clothes for my future children...i went to the segundas the other day to look for a gift for marisol and you would not believe the adorable, way inexpensive, and super fun baby clothes that are everywhere. it's almost too hard to resist. wierd? quite possibly. resourceful? definitely.

pretty good day today...the day of the revolution is on friday, and we're having a big parade with both of our classes. we started making our costumes and explaining what we're celebrating today. so tired; off to bed!

here's the picture of marisol and teddy writing their story on friday...love them!


saturday we spent the whole day - literally, almost sun up to sun down - working on the roof at the grandma's old house that some of her kids now live in. this woman is the definition of a matriarch...she has at least 11 kids (that i've met) and who knows how many more. she's the one who asked paco and i to replant a tree last week because she didn't like where it was. anyways, the roof was in horrible shape. adriana fell through up to her thigh because the wood was rotted but no one could tell because it was covered by like 3 layers of roofing paper. she was fine but has a nasty cut. with about 13 people we managed to get it done in a day and a half - we finished up the edging on sunday afternoon.
saturday night we watched the big fight in las vegas. everyone at church is super in to boxing...paco and david grew up watching fights together with their uncles. it's actually kind of interesting when i realized there's technique and purpose behind the punches hahaha. the guy we were rooting for lost and looked horrible by the end...his face was so swollen he looked like some monster. eek.
kerly, adriana and david's daughter, is SO FUN to be around...she's at that stage where she talks and talks and talks but so far only says a few intelligble words. she's good at repeating, though, so we make her say all kinds of funny things. she can shake her finger at you and say, 'no nina no!'
i stayed at church on sunday night, too, because today there were no classes since it was a festival day. today was adriana's birthday! she's 17 and married with a 1 year old daughter. that girl grew up fast. she's doing pretty well though. we all made breakfast together and then went to visit an uncle - kid #11 of the grandma - at his church.
paco, cyndy (his sister) and i went to the segundas - second hand stores - and oh my goodness. i don't know how these places work, but clothes from everywhere for prices i have never heard of. i found a shirt from wicked, the play, for 25 pesos. that's like $2. they go for THIRTY at the show. gah! anything and everything you can think of, household wise, can be found at a segunda in ensenada. no joke. it's pretty overwhelming.

i feel like i've hit a wall with my spanish. i've been warned about and heard of this wall, and i think i'm there. i feel like the more i can understand, the less i can say because of how much more i understand, and therefore i realize how dumb i sound. it's fine here with the kids and workers because they're forgiving and have listened to me for 3 months...but when i'm out with friends i feel like i have the vocabulary of a toddler. it's annoying and i'm not sure what i can do to get better...i think i just have to keep listening and making a fool out of myself...but really. i'm not sure how much more patience i have. lourdes? come down and be my private tutor?

the kids totally impressed me today. last night chuy and i were planning for today and he said that the kids were going to look at a sequence of drawings and write a story to go along with the drawings. i was skeptical...i really didn't think they were going to be able to do it because they would get frustrated, bored, or just give up. our best writer is still sounding out words, individual sound by individual sound, and it takes a long time to get a sentence down. well, i was wrong! thank goodness! the kids did great! teddy and marisol worked together and did so wonderfully. alex, tonio, jose and i worked together and i wrote what they wanted to say in their story. omar and marcos worked with chuy and worked really hard to get a good start to their story. i have some adorable pictures i'll post on sunday night. it was a really good day...
headed to church for the weekend - tomorrow we're working on the new room adjacent to the sanctuary. it's ready for concrete....although last week it was too. we'll see what happens. have a great weekend! stay warm! it was a beautiful tshirt and capris type of day here...with a light breeze throughout the day and a gorgeous sunset... :)

today was better. i was very intentional with my actions and my choice to make it a good day...praising the students for good work and heading off problems and fights before they got out of control. i was hoping that chuy would see the way i've been problem solving with the kids for the past 3 months and absorb some of those skills to do the same thing himself...but he's not quite there yet. these kids still need to learn life skills. marcos, omar, and marisol have been here since they were babies, and they've grown up with 4 other kids and 'moms' that are always coming and going. they haven't had consistency like children do with their parent(s). i think that this is one of the main reasons they are lacking in problem solving skills. when omar gets angry, he bursts into tears. when marcos gets angry, he yells 'no' at the top of his lungs over and over. when marisol gets angry, she shuts down and is unapproachable. it's such a crazy and quick change. i'm trying to avoid getting to this point and instead we have been talking through their anger and involving the other person. some times it seems like all they want to do is tattle or get angry! i understand that they're 6 and will still have fits from time to time...but still. they can learn how to work through a problem, and that's what we have been and will continue to be doing.
i found out tonight that we don't have school on monday. apparently every month there's a 'suspension of labor' day. works for me!

whew. today was just...one of those days. one of those days when you find yourself wondering what you have gotten yourself into and why. i suppose i should be glad thats it's the middle of november and this is the first why-do-i-love-teaching-again? days.
the kids were off, my patience was low, and it was just a hard day. i know tomorrow will be better. even with the hardest days, i'm thankful for them because they make the good days that much better.

after preschool i went to the big house to hang out with the kids who i know love me :) whenever anyone takes blanca out of her wheelchair, she gets to excited. she just loves to be held. not even held, just with someone. she was perfectly happy sitting in my lap while i played with the ball with thelma. i sent jaime flying through the air on my feet...pretty sure he's never done that before. he wasn't quite sure what was going on at first but started laughing and didn't stop until i put him down. he has the best laugh. i was holding thelma - she's a lot like blanca and loves loves loves to be held and cuddled - and i kissed her a couple times on the cheek. i was watching jaime play and felt something on my cheek...thelma kissed me! i made her do it again to make sure she wasn't trying to bite me or eat my cheek hahaha. it was SO PRECIOUS! those kids, man, have so much love. whether it's in their laugh, smile, or kiss, i just can't get enough of it.

so this morning we were doing an experiment where we put a carrot, a plant, and a glass of water, all wrapped or covered in plastic wrap, in the sun for half an hour. we talked about what each thing looked like before it was in the sun, what we thought would happen, and what actually happened. chuy asked marisol what happened with the plant, and marisol said it 'was sad.' so cute, but so true! it wilted and just really didn't look happy anymore. oh, kids.
preschool was a little crazy - we spent more time cleaning up than playing. their favorite way to play is take the huge box of legos and throw them, one by one, into the neighbor's yard. they never get very far because chuy or i stop them, but seriously, i'm convinced they would do that for days if we let them.
off to practice paper mache for arts and crafts tomorrow...

conafe came again today. it was really good to have them here...they are really holding chuy accountable for what he has (or hasn't) been doing. everytime they come i figure out more things that we were supposed to be doing that we haven't...i feel like i'm back in the states again and can't keep up with the curriculum hahaha
1st grade is now going to be from 8:30 to 2 with a break for lunch, and preschool from 2 to 4. it was supposed to be like this from day 1.
it's frustrating to figure out all these things that we were supposed to be happening 3 months ago. at the same time, i'm finding comfort in knowing that these kids have been getting an education in some way, shape, or form, since school started. 10 of our 13 students have never and will probably never go to school, so even the fact that they're in a classroom environment, learning something, is great.
i'm learning so much personally and growing a ton. a couple months ago, this would have destroyed me. knowing that there were expectations and standards that i wasn't fulfilling, that i was unknowingly letting people down, would have been too much to handle. but now, instead of dwelling on what we haven't been doing, i'm taking a deep breath, thanking God for the good things that have happened so far, and asking for strength in the days to come. as they say here - siguimos adelante. continue ahead!

a group from san diego came on friday to work on the boy's new house. they bought all the rest of the stuff we need - praise God! - and spent friday and saturday busting through that place. we are so close to being done...and then the school can move inside to the boy's old house, chuy will have his own room, and the boys will move to their new house!

right as i was leaving with paco on friday afternoon, al (castro, from rancho el refugio) called me to let me know that rue, a guy who works for mexico outreach, and his family were in ensenada for the weekend! he preached friday night at espigas nuevas, a men's rehab right down the street from fuente de vida (marta's church). i stopped by to see him and it was so great! juan jose came up to me right away with this year's mexico outreach sweatshirt and goes, you were here last april weren't you? with your group from new york? he and arturo (who 'graduated' from the rehab and is now working in chapultapec) helped with camp ops last april. it was so great to see him! he knows a lot more english now, but it was funny because he was speaking english and i was speaking spanish. javier, the director of the rehab, remembered our group from this summer as well and asked how everyone was doing. so fun to see everyone. rue's kids are ADORABLE.

saturday we spent the whole day working on the roof at church. we nailed down chicken wire, or something like that, so that the cement could be poured on top. paco told me it's a mexican trick to make it look like it's made out of something nicer than it actually is. clever...
before we got to work, the grandma had us replanting her garden...it was so funny. all of a sudden she decided she didn't like where one plant (rather, small tree) was so we had to dig it up, roots and all, carry it to the place she wanted it, and then replant it.
then she realized that someone had locked the keys to the main gate, the house, and her room in her room. of course, there was no spare that existed, so we spent awhile trying to pick the lock. when that didn't work, we moved the party outside and set up the most rickety, unsafe, 20 feet high contraption that i have ever seen to get to the window. mimi cut the screen with a knife and jumped in. i got my camera because it was just too funny to miss. they were all laughing at me as i was taking pictures but i was like i cannot forget this! they think i'm so wierd.

quite exciting...and this all happened before lunch.

later that night paco and i picked rocio up and headed to porvenir for the youth group thing. it wasn't a missions conference, really, just like a gigantic youth group. tons of teenagers were there, from all over baja. there was a worship band, they played some games on stage, and then chris richards spoke about love and marriage. he has a book out called dang it! i married a loser. funny guy - good with high school age. the emcee of the night was marcos, the pastor of the church we were at. he's american but has been here for years and years and is awesome. really dynamic, loud, and full of energy. the kids loooved him, and he was nonstop with jokes that had everyone laughing. i was really glad rocio went. it was totally geared toward her and she had a lot of fun. so crazy - we were walking to our seats and i walked right by palau and his brother - the worship leaders from kids camp! i was like what the heck man, this is crazy! didn't get a chance to talk to him but it was so fun to see him. i also saw the kid who was in the kids camp drama a few years ago - i have seen him in the most random places...first in the kids camp drama, then a year later at a site we were visiting with barnabas, the next year skateboarding at a park in ensenada, and now here. and he speaks english so he really can't get away from me. i'm positive he's creeped out, because every time i see him i get so excited. oh well. i can't tell you how fun it is to see familiar faces when i'm 3,000+ miles away from home.




today was super exciting...christian and lis announced their engagement in church! well, their intent to get married. after the service, everyone went to lis's house, and they got engaged! like in front of everyone! it was a little strange for me but that's how they do it here. it was super formal - marta introduced the parents to one another, even though they'd met before, and they each stated the intent of the visit and what they expected to happen. then christian got down on one knee, busted out the ring, and did the whole romantic will you marry me thing! she said yes, of course, and then we all had a party to celebrate with them. they don't have a date yet, but woo hoo!

church for the weekend, and hopefully that missions conference tomorrow if the rides work out. have a great weekend!

i found a dvd of a fox news segment about gabriel house from 8 years ago right before dinner...it was so fun to watch! 3 times, in fact hahaha the kids loved it. it was so cute to see all of the kids - ely, chely, sonja, chuy, raul, sergio...8 years younger. they went back to raul's house and showed the place he was kept locked in every day for 7 years...it really was a wooden outhouse and nothing more. unbelievable.
it was crazy though; there was a part with ely and ted where she was pulling herself along the floor, feeding herself, giving kisses, and making sounds. she can't do any of that anymore. it's pretty sad to know it's still the same ely as 8 years ago, just a lot less capable of physical tasks. i wondered how she felt to see herself like that.

becky sent a ton of supplies for the boys and i just got them today...they will be so excited to see their new stuff tomorrow!

good day at school. chuy has complete control and things are feeling less forced. all morning teddy seemed just a little off, and after recess his face was an alarming shade of green. he kept saying he felt okay, but then he got really quiet like he does when he did something wrong. i had asked him a couple of times if he wanted to go to the bathroom or felt like he had to throw up...and all of a sudden he goes, 'i want to throw up.' i wheeled him in to the bathroom, and of course before we got there he started puking all over himself. poor kiddo :( he was totally fine and back to normal after, though. and he also found out his birthday is sunday so that cheered him up!

i worked with alex in the afternoon on school stuff and also some sign language. they have this great book of spanish sign language that martin had been using when he was doing the school. alex has a ton of potential and already knows a lot of signs, but it would be awesome if he could learn even more. my dream, and i told him this, is to be able to sign or write exactly what he wants to say. that's why we're working on sounding words out and then writing them down, but signing each letter (or the word if he knows it) first. fun stuff!

today was...full. someone from conafe came to observe chuy and the school. it was also the first day we had both classes together, and the preschool kids (that are used to a 1 hour class) were supposed to be there for the full 3 and a half hours. needless to say, that didn't work out so well. the good thing was that conafe was able to see why it's very hard to have the two classes at the same time, so we got the okay to separate again (thank you Lord!). renie, angelica, chuy, the woman from conafe, and i sat down to talk for a loooooong time. it was a good conversation - we got a lot of stuff out on the table, frustrations were expressed, grace and mercy were shown, and i helped translate when angelica had to leave :)

centro de salud stopped by right before lunch to give everyone flu shots...it was pretty funny to see the varying degrees of hysteria. it was just like any other shot, a pinch and then nothing, but you would have thought some of those kids were mortally wounded. none of the kids in the big house, either. ely smiled through the whole thing. it was teddy, alex, and jose who were freaking out. it was cute though - they were making a big deal out of being so brave and ready for the shot, but the look on their faces when they felt that pinch was priceless. i couldn't help but laugh, and they were laughing too, when they saw the pictures. just another day at gabriel house...

i was grocery shopping in calimax when i realized what music they were playing...frosty the snowman. in spanish. and then, right after that, have a holly jolly christmas, followed by oasis's wonderwall. OH. MY. GOODNESS. really now.

today was so great. we didn't have school, because it's a national holiday (day of the dead). it was so awesome to just hang out with the kids. i went on walks with the boys, the kids down below and i went to a bakery together (they make this special bread for the holiday...it's called dead bread and it is DELICIOUS), and i spent a lot of time talking to renie about how school is going.

a group came today from a base in porvenir, about an hour away from here. ventana was started by a couple from the states and they live here now, and host kind of a gap year thing for kids who just graduated highschool. they'll be coming every other week to hang out with us, which will be really cool. they're hosting a huge conference on saturday night for mexican teenagers from san quintin all the way to tijuana. i'm planning on going, and hopefully rocio will come with me. we shall see.

good talks, good times, and a beautiful day :)

friday was good - the end of a long week! chuy came back from his conafe thing on friday afternoon and told me that from now on, we need to have our morning class (4 kids in wheelchairs and 3 six year olds) and our preschool class (3 kids with downs, 2 with hiv, and one who wears a helmet because he's that unsteady) together in the morning. WOW. not quite sure how that's going to happen, but spent a lot of time this weekend asking God to calm me down. it's a little frustrating because we are, as far as i know, the only conafe program that has kids with disabilities, but we have to have classes together just like everyone else (but we're not everyone else!). eek.
i like to be in charge and i don't like change, and i'm not in charge and there are lots of changes. i know that i have a lot to learn from this as well as the kids. everything will be okay...somehow...

saturday we worked on the new room at the church - they put the roof on, installed skylights, and covered it with roof paper or something. paco and i went to a softball game that his friend invited him to...it was so funny. most of the men were well into their 40s, and they were having a lot of fun. no one was exceptionally good, and the catcher spent more time chucking his helmet and mask to the side as he ran after the ball than actually catching, the outfielders stuck their arms out to try to catch the ball but usually didn't make contact, and there were several collisions between the runner and the person trying to catch a pop fly. seriously, though, everyone was having a great time, and it was fun to be a part of.

halloween is not celebrated here by people in the church, but there were some trick or treaters running around in their costumes. we were at a bakery picking up stuff for the people who had worked on the roof and kids came in, trick or treating. i've never trick or treated at a bakery before! they didn't even get baked goods...just candy. i would have asked for a cookie or something hahaha

a guy from california who has done a lot of work with rancho el refugio and fuente de vida (marta's church) came to church today with his family - 6 kids!
i translated the sermon for them and then later when we were eating with everyone i helped translate, too! it was awesome.

we were driving back from rocio's house when i asked paco what the difference between pelo and cabello is. i always say pelo for a person's hair, but a lot of times i hear people say cabello. he goes, ' oh yeah, pelo is for animals.' WHAT? i was like paco...i've been here for 3 months and told who knows how many people how beautiful their animal hair looked. why didn't you tell me? he goes oh i didn't want you to feel embarrassed. well that makes a whole lot of sense. grr.

church for the weekend! will post on sunday along with a monthly update...i cannot believe it's been another month already. aah!

great day of school. whenever i stop worrying so much about every little detail and celebrate the things the kids ARE doing (instead of getting frustrated over what they're not doing) things go so much better. it's awesome to realize that my mood has a direct effect on every one of the kids in the class. if i'm stressed and trying to get through a lot of stuff and trying to keep every kid on task 100% of the time, they rebel against that. if i keep up the constant and direct positive reinforcement along with some space for constructed play time, everyone is much happier, and as a result, more work gets done. 4 years of teaching in the states has made me into someone i don't always like - always working with my back against the wall, with a schedule that i feel like i'll never be able to get through, and curriculum that seems overwhelming. gahh.

today at lunch, ted and renie stopped by to pull names for paychecks. this was a good sign - money came from somewhere, enough to put together part of a paycheck. they pull one or two names every two weeks, and this person gets their full two weeks of pay. everyone else gets less, because we never have enough money to pay everyone in full. well, renie pulled two names, and then kept pulling, and pulling, and pulling, until everyone's name had been pulling. we got two donations in the last 2 days that paid for all of our bills this month, including our entire payroll! what a miracle!

today i learned the word for cheater - tramPOso (say it with disgust...it's kind of satisfying hahaha). teddy, tonio, sergio, jose, and alex and i spent the afternoon playing hide and seek in the street in front of their house. it was so fun and by the last round they finally kept their eyes closed the whole time. little by little...step by step...changes are made...

today was SO windy! oh my goodness. it was kind of hard to have school when the dirt was blowing in our faces and flowers, leaves, sticks, and trash were swirling around our feet. yikes. hopefully the boys' house will be done soon so we can move inside their old house! we did take advantage of the chaos, though, and had a lot of fun with the kite! we didn't even have to run with it so the kids in chairs got to fly it, too.
i walked to the store with jaime and we saw a couple kids who made their own kite out of a garbage bag and string. it was awesome and totally worked.
chuy went to ensenada today for something with conafe, so i taught alone. it was so funny (and comforting) to think about where we were the last time i taught alone, and how far we've come since then!

so the concert yesterday was a lot of fun. it was at a church downtown by the harbor. the church was unlike any church i've ever seen in ensenada - huge! it used to be a movie theater. eliseo told me to come early to help, so i got to guard a staircase in the middle of the church :) it was cool though because i was inside with the rest of the staff and got to see the band warmup. i felt like i was at a concert in the states!
i recognized one of the girls from roca de salvacion, and i started talking to her. she said she was so glad she saw me because when i was talking on sunday about gabriel house, God put it on her heart to help us. she and her neice want to collect money or at least get a list out of our needs. she was really passionate about it, asking me tons of questions and seemed really interested in finding a way to help. so cool!
almost all of the people from the class on sunday were at the concert, and it was super fun to be hanging out with friends that were my age! the drummer was awesome. he started beat boxing in the middle of this really slow worship song, and slowly it got faster and faster until it was an all out dance break. eliseo was crazy - in the beginning, the pastor of the church was shouting out names of cities to figure out where everyone was from, eliseo kept screaming 'new york city!' in that slightly high pitched voice of his.
cande and angelica were there, too. he is so awesome...he wears his heart on his sleeve and it is such a beautiful thing. dad, no one could ever replace you, so no worries...but i kind of feel like cande's a favorite uncle or something. he always gives me a huge hug and warm smile whenever he sees me. and then reminds me i'm not allowed to have a boyfriend or go downtown at night!
abraham is the drummer in the roca de salvacion worship band and he has a 2 year old son, bryan. i tell you, that kid is going to be famous very soon. i swear he was born with drumsticks in his hands. he was at the concert (in a suit!) and was drumming on the seats the whole time. that kid is good! its really weird to see a 2 year old keeping a beat with drumsticks....but awesome.

becky left today! we had a big party for her at lunch. as the car was pulling away, alex (our super sensitive friend...) got teary and was crying a little. then tonio saw, and so he started bawling, and then i looked at teddy and he had tears streaming down his face. then lerma started crying because the boys were crying! becky gave each kid a picture of her and that kid this morning and decorated the picture frame, so i ran inside to get those while explaining that she would be back in less than 2 months. when they saw the pictures, all 3 of them started crying even harder. oops.
it must be hard for the kids to not have anyone permenant in thar lives. there are workers that stay for a long time but other than ted and renie, everyone's come and gone :/
i'm glad i still have 7 months before i have to leave...gahh

concert was great! caleb, pastor cande's 15 year old son, and abraham, the drummer in the worship band, played with the opening band. it was awesome. so tired...will write more tomorrow.

whoosh! once again, the weekend flew by.
saturday becky and i went into downtown ensenada and she did some last minute shopping. later, paco and i were hanging out with his sister and her 6 year old daughter (who, thanks to her uncle, believes i'm from russia and have a pet bear. it's been 3 weeks now, and she still believes us...) when marta called us and told us we were going to a party. one of the kids in the church, isaac, turned 16. we stopped at church to pick some people up and she asked me where my bag was, because she assumed i was sleeping over. i told her no, i was going to roca de salvacion on sunday because i haven't been there for awhile and after eliseo's (minor yet unfortunate) car accident i wanted to be there. she said i could sleep over anyways and i told her i felt rude, using her for a bed and not even going to church. she goes well if i'm giving you permission it's not rude! she scared me at first, but she really is extremely nice.
her mom, who lives at the church too, is awesome. again, first impression is she's very intimidating, but once you get to know her she is really sweet and always cracking jokes. last week she turned 86(ish)! i had no idea. she acts like she's about 60...always moving around, cooking, cleaning, or doing something. she has at least 11 kids, possibly more. paco, her grandson, doesn't even know how many aunts and uncles he has!
roca de salvacion was incredible. i was having a terrible morning for a variety of reasons and it was that much more awesome to be there. i just felt like i could breathe again. eliseo led worship and did a great job, as usual. we sang amazing love, dancing generation, trading my sorrows, and a bunch more that i can't remember.
right before the service started, cande asked me if i could share about my time at gabriel house so far. it was the first time i've done something all by myself like that in spanish! it wasn't that long but it went really well. i started out by saying i still can't speak a lot of spanish, but i'll try, and with God all things are possible, right? i got some solid amens which was a good start :)
i went to the sunday school that had people from 11 up to 25 years old. it was kind of funny, but so cool to hang out with that many kids that were more or less my age. angelica, cande's wife, led the class.
there's a concert tomorrow that eliseo was selling tickets for - i tell you, i don't know why he's going into administration; he would be a very good salesman. it's (apparently) a pretty famous drummer and his worship band playing at a church downtown, right by the flag. i'm super excited...i'm going early to help eliseo. we're event staff! i have no idea what it will be like hahaha

such a fun day.
martin and i took thelma and jaime to the hospital for check ups. they had a great time...they really enjoyed being in a different place with different sights, sounds, and smells. the road from where we parked to the hospital was really bumpy, almost like cobblestones, and both of them were laughing so hard as they bounced along. it was hilarious.

i finally went to the bike shop and bought a new tire for sergio's bike. it's a foot pedal bike, so he's the only one who can use it, but becky used to ride it with someone in the basket on the back! teddy and i went for a walk with it, and it's a lot better for him. he can't ride jose's bike because his legs are way too short, but he can steer and be pushed really easily in this one. here's a picture of pilar trying to figure out what's going on!




i was organizing all of our school supplies this afternoon and found a huge, 5 foot long kite tucked away in a corner. it wasn't really that windy, but that thing flew. it was so fun. i brought the kids from down below up to take turns with the kite, and we spent the whole afternoon in the street, running back and forth and flying the kite, mexican style :)

i think i have writer's block. lots on my mind but can't put anything into words!

off to the hospital with jaime, thelma, and angelino tomorrow. last week was apparently slow for a friday, and every one of the 4 waiting rooms we were in was standing room only. i wonder what tomorrow will be like...

school was awesome this morning. i felt like i had unlimited patience and an abundance of joy, so thank you for your prayers!
chuy is taking more of the responsibility of school, which is the way things need to keep going. the two of us spend the half hour before school starts setting up and talking about his plans for the day. i give him ideas for how to supplement the material - how to make it suitable for our class, how to help the kids stay interested, how to make sure everyone participates - stuff from my 'bag of tricks' that he is still developing.
one thing i've figured out about my relationship with chuy is that we're both in positions we've never been in before. i spent the last 4 years working with at least one (if not 2!) mentor teachers who watched my every move and gave me tons of feedback, both encouragement and constructive criticism. now i'm the one who has ideas to share and feedback to give, and it's a new and unfamiliar position for me to be in. now that i've realized this, though, i have felt more comfortable being that mentor teacher for chuy. (not the best one out there, that's for dang sure, but i'm trying.)

becky's starting to pack - she leaves tuesday! she's going back to maine to try to raise some more money and then she's off to language school for 4 months, starting in january. i'll definitely be speaking less english when she leaves. that's not a bad thing, though!

this is my sweet naynay (and marcos) who i have yet to take a decent picture with. the girl never stops moving. she can kind of talk...she can understand a lot and speaks in 2 or 3 word phrases and will repeat a lot of what you say. she's hard to understand but the more time you spend with her the more you can understand what she's saying. hanna, the summer intern, left less than a week after i got here. irene never quite grasped that my name isn't hanna, too, so she's been calling me hanna since i got here. i know i should have corrected her from day 1, but i was just happy she was recognizing me and calling me something. we're working on getting hilary down. anyways, in school today, she said josue's name, and then just to be sure, i asked her chuy's name, which she said, and then my name. she said hanna, and she wanted to keep working on her puzzle, so i just said, si, mas o menos (more or less) and kind of shrugged my shoulders and smiled. priceless - she did the exact same thing, except mas o menos came out as ma o mayo. same voice pitch and everything. it was so funny.

i made cupcakes for the boys to decorate this afternoon, and we had some extras so i gave them to the ladies. i tried to explain that the frosting and crumbled cookies go on top of the cupcake, but the ladies kept calling it bread and said it would be too sweet with the frosting and cookies. they had a point :) the boys had no problem with this, though. teddy wanted a spoonful of frosting for each bite of cupcake. ha!

today was great. chuy and i are communicating better and he's beginning to trust me more. today was the first day i felt like we were truly and 100% a team, working together to bring our students an education. sweet!
jose can be pretty resistant to school sometimes. i think part of it is because he knows he's the oldest and he also knows he can't do what a lot of the other kids in his class can...read, write quickly and neatly, and other things like that. he needs a lot of one on one time to get a task accomplished, and it's really hard because i don't always have the time he needs (the life of a teacher, regardless of the country or language, right?). during science we were talking about bodies and drawing ourselves, and i worked with jose to get this out of him - the yellow paper in the background. he worked so hard and was so proud. can't you tell?

i took ely for a walk this afternoon...so fun. we walked by our neighbor's house, and he grows peppers and grapes so we were looking at them up close. there was a tree outside his property that had purple berry looking things on it, so i thought i'd try one. well i can safely say they were not berries. it was the nastiest thing - really bitter and sour. i couldn't get the taste out of my mouth and ely was doing her laugh-so-hard-i-get-nervous thing. eek. totally worth it though for her to laugh like that.

this is the view from rocio's house. we had a heat wave this weekend...it's been cold in the mornings and at night but saturday and sunday were HOT. apparently this is not the case in new york...

friday i had to go to the hospital with martin. becky usually goes with him, but she went to the states for a mexican medical open house. chuy did school alone, which was good for him to experience, and he also did a great job! we talked about it after and he was exhausted but had them do a great craft and the kids said it went well.
we left mimi at the hospital and she's still there - she has a ton of water on her brain and has since she was born. the xrays are just unbelivable - none of the doctors understand how she's alive, let alone eating and responsive. her head is about the size of soccer ball, and a solid 4/5 is water, with her tiny little brain at the bottom. anyways, she's been having some neurological problems with mini seizures, a really tense body, and grinding her teeth, so hopefully they will figure out what's wrong and get her the right medecines.
we picked up medecine for some other kids and one of our poor constipated babies got looked at too :/
i saw teddy's dad at the hospital, someone from laerma's church who spoke english, and another guy from a neighboring rehab. it was really cool to recognize faces!
it was great to spend some time with martin. he's also a pastor and has worked at gabriel house for 3 years. he taught the school before we got the conafe program, does a lot of therapy with the kids, and is the all around handy man with just about everything. he's got such a great heart and is an evangelist, let me tell you. he's really passionate about gabriel house and the kids, and it was really good for me to hear his stories and testimonies about his time at gabriel house. we spent almost 7 hours at the hospital for 3 appointments, which apparently is quite normal. the good thing is we got all the medecine and appointments we needed.

friday night paco and i worked on my message for the young adult class on saturday morning...i asked him to translate for me because i knew i wouldn't be understood as well as i needed to be. what our friday night study session turned out to be was him reading a sentence in english, not understanding it, me saying it in spanish, and him translating my spanish to correct spanish. it was hilarious, but took like 2 and a half hours for a 20 minute message. eek.

it went well on saturday morning, and it was really fun to be able to teach. the week that marta asked me to teach i was reading james chapter 2, about faith without works, and kind of rediscovering that passage again. i was underlining and writing down verses that i liked, and i realized i underlined or wrote down almost the whole chapter! i knew that was what i would teach about...faith without works. i found a great story online about swimming and not knowing how and learning all about it but still not jumping in...or something like that. i have the text of the lesson if you want to read it - just email me and let me know!

rocio and i spent the afternoon hanging out and getting some more supplies. i haven't hung out with her in awhile so it was good to spent more than a couple minutes with her. she's so funny. such a 17 year old. i asked her how she was doing and she did that, 'oh, i'm fine," with a big sigh and eyes that begged to be asked for more. she told me she found out this week that she has asthma, and everyone on her dad's side has it, and she can't box, run, or sing anymore. i feel bad for her, obviously, but i don't understand how she was able to do all this stuff before, but all of sudden, with this diagnosis, she isn't able to do it now! we spent awhile trying to figure that out, and she couldn't tell me. not sure if it was because of the language or she really doesn't know...but now she has an inhaler. apparently no one here has asthma, so i tried to explain to her that tons of people in the states have it and it doesn't affect most people too severly. that was news to her, so hopefully she can feel a little better about herself now...

church today - rosa preached about the armor of God in isaiah 44. it was great - she's a strong preacher. she doesn't mess around and she makes sure that everyone understands what she's saying. it's a very good thing, though, because that should happen when a preacher is preaching :)

teddy, alex, and tonio got to go to church today with becky, kim, and chloe. they had a great time...it's the same church their sister goes to so they got to see her, too. teddy got scared and started crying during the drama, tonio fell asleep during the sermon, and alex almost jumped out of his chair while people were clapping during the altar call. other than that they had a great time and were so excited to tell me about it when i got back this afternoon. we have a hotel shuttle size bus that was donated that doesn't have insurance right now...we're in the process of getting that and hopefully when we do we can take lots of kids to church every week!

pictures!

so renie got to meet the first lady of mexico yesterday! she was at a conference about social justice in mexico. she was able to invite senora calderon to gabriel house and give her some info. there are some great plans in the works...probably will be a long time before they are in effect but the idea is still a great start.

i was at renie's this morning when cristina brought mimi over, because she was really not doing well. her whole body was tense and she was grinding her teeth so hard i thought they would break. we're taking her to the doctor tomorrow but before cristina took mimi back we laid hands and prayed for her. after we prayed she was so calm. it was beautiful. no more teeth grinding, no more tense body...she just looked tired. ted said they have so many stories like that, it's just so cool. pilar came to us as a newborn - she's 8 now - with a hole in her heart. they had ekg pictures of her heart and when they took her took a doctor 3 days later, the doctor asked if they had the same baby, because there was no hole in her heart. none. gone! wow.

there's a man who keeps his horse in this little field next to the boys' house, and he was bringing her back today when jose waved him over. he brought the horse over and talked to the boys for awhile - everyone except sergio, who's afraid of dogs and horses - and teddy asked him where his cowboy hat was. he thought that was pretty funny.

victor loves to give the babies a kiss on the cheek, but for some reason after the kiss he insists on trying to slap the baby. we have been working very hard on a kiss and nothing more...and lately he's been getting better and better at that. it may be because i pull the baby away before he can do anything else...but i think he understands that a kiss happens without hitting.

betzy's here! she's really sweet and so fun - she doesn't talk but she smiles when you talk to her. it's so precious. she's 8 years old and 17 pounds...and we put her in the wheelchair of a small 3 year old. her already impoverished grandma was taking care of her but she died a couple weeks ago. hopefully she will gain weight in a healthy and quick way, and we can get to know her and her needs better.

the floor of our classroom is paved but it kind of slopes off to one side, and omar's chair was too far back and the first thing he did when he sat down was flip over backwards into the fence. he was hysterical, even though there wasn't a drop of blood or bruise to be seen. mr. tough guy reached out for me in front of everyone and just sobbed into my shoulder. i know he was scared and not hurt but still...when these kids cry like that and all their defenses are down, i realize just how lonely they are sometimes. they're always surrounded by kids and work with people who love them, but sometimes life is just tough.

renie went to a conference today to represent gabriel house, and the first lady of mexico was there. haven't heard yet how it went, but i hope she got to meet her and tell her about gabriel house!

school was a little rough today for a couple different reasons, but the kids learned that we have five senses and they can name all of them. for that, i will rejoice. we used popcorn while it was in the microwave and after, as we were eating, to talk about the 5 senses and how we use them while we're making and eating popcorn.
in the afternoon luz, the woman who works below with the preschoolers, and becky and i went for a walk with the kids down below. it was so great to get out with all of them. they had a lot of fun and no one ran away!
after that martin brought teddy over to the big house and arranged all the kids in wheelchairs so they were facing teddy and made a big deal out of him being the teacher and having everyone get ready for class. he was so thrilled....when he gets excited he puts his hands out in front of him, kind of like he's going to give you high 5s, and scrunches his whole body up. its kind of frightening if you don't know what's happening but when you realize he's super happy it's a great thing to see. he spent the next half hour reading out loud from a kid's bible. it was a lot of fun for everyone.
i went to ted and renie's tonight for the tuesday night worship thing. we talked a lot about what's going on here and it's always good for me to listen and get to know their hearts better.
becky and i went grocery shopping and the CHRISTMAS aisle was up and ready to go. eek! halloween is a really dark holiday here - they celebrate day of the dead - and there's obviously no thanksgiving in november...so the next major holiday is christmas. wow.

so saturday morning i was sitting in the young adult (ish) class at church, thinking about how relieved i felt because i knew marta would never ask me to teach this class. she knows how i speak spanish...it's one thing to teach sunday school to a bunch of 7 year olds, but quite another to teach a sunday school class to a room full of teenagers and 20somethings. after the class ended on saturday marta goes, 'hilary, can you teach next week?' oh good gracious. no, marta, i cannot teach next week, were the first words out of my mouth. not don't want to...can't. in spanish anyways. she looks at me and goes sure you can! this is not someone you say no to....so i'm doing it in english, and paco's going to translate. gahh. that woman will certainly be the cause of my premature wrinkles.

school was good today - a couple of tough moments, but omar and marcos are getting a lot better at turning their behavior around and making good choices. before, if they got upset or angry...forget it. they were done for the day. now, with positive but persuasive words and lots of love, they are doing much better at owning their actions and changing them for the better after they get upset or angry. it's really cool to see them take control and be proud of their choices.

we talked about story today, and chuy asked me to put that one the schedule. i asked him what story it was and he said something. what? he said it again. i don't know that story, i told him. he looked at me weird and rolled away and then brought the book over to show me. it was christopher columbus, except in spanish its something totally different. oh yes, chuy, actually i do know the story of the person who discovered the continent i live on. ha! we had a good laugh.

we might be getting another girl at gabriel house, which is just crazy to think about in the midst of these serious financial struggles. here's the email renie (the co-director) sent out tonight.

Two days ago I was visited by my friend, Monica Pickett Gonzalez . Monica is a lawyer and social advocate for DIF, (el Desarrollo Integral de la Familia or the Integral Development of the Family). DIF is a government agency that helps to develop and strengthen families in Mexico. Monica works tirelessly day and night to place children at risk in the safest homes she can find. There are few homes available.

Monica came for another matter, but as she left, she thrust paperwork into Ted’s hands. All that she asked is that Ted and I take a look at it and pray about what we could do. I knew if I looked I’d be hooked but I could not resist; another handicapped child begged for a home.

The paperwork showed pictures of a little 8 year old girl named Betzira. Our family has already nicknamed her, “Betzy”.

As I scanned the papers, I saw photos of the twisted body of an incredibly emaciated and handicapped little girl. The papers say she weighs just 7.8 kilograms. “That’s only 17 pounds” my mind screamed, “My Annie weighed three times that weight at eight years old!” I wish I could send you the pictures I am staring at in disbelief as I write this.

Her former medical history is unknown. What is known is that Betzy is an abandoned, handicapped orphan in a country that is not yet handicapped friendly.

Her mother, who is addicted to drugs, abandoned her at two months of age and her whereabouts is listed as unknown. Betzy’s only known relative was her impoverished great grandmother who took care of her the best that she could until she died a few weeks ago.

The brief information begs the following questions; how is it that an eight year old child only weighs 17 pounds? What kind of incredible suffering and deprivation did this child and her aging and sick great grandmother go through?

She desperately needs the love and care that we at Gabriel House so want to give but we are limited by the lack of financial donations we are now receiving. Please, please help us.

Ted and I have been pouring over the names of our children; asking ourselves which ones we need to give up and send elsewhere in order to keep those more needy? Which ones will be wrenched from the only family and home they have ever known?

Do you have any idea what an impossible task that is? We have raised most of these children since infancy. How can we sacrifice one for another? What will it do to them to lose the only home they have ever known?

Please don’t turn away thinking someone else will help. Betzy needs all of us; no donation is too small. Bless your hearts; I know that many of you are worried and afraid about how you are going to pay your own bills. I also know that God will bless your giving.

(Jas 1:27) What God the Father considers to be pure and genuine religion is this: to take care of orphans and widows in their suffering and to keep oneself from being corrupted by the world.

(Heb 13:5)GNB Keep your lives free from the love of money, and be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, "I will never leave you; I will never abandon you".

(Pro 19:17) GNB When you give to the poor it is like lending to the LORD and the LORD will pay you back.

Love in the mighty name of Jesus,

Renie

www.gabrielhouseofmexico.com

For those of you who will give; Write Gabriel House on the envelope or the memo line of your check, and send to:

Mexican Medical Ministries

7850 Lester Ave.

Lemon Grove Ca. 91945

One hundred percent of your donation will come straight to Gabriel house.

whew! here i am again...sunday night with a full week ahead of me. i'm ahead on planning for school this week which is normal when i'm teaching in the states but very rare when i'm here :)

the party was really fun. we spent the whole weekend getting ready...cleaning, decorating, cooking, talking, teaching kerly how to say she's 1...
typical party for a 1 year old. tons of people are there for her and she has no idea what's going on. it was funny too because both (yes, both) of the pinatas were at least twice as big as her. she was only scared of them when they were flying through the air...otherwise she kept trying to hit them.

pictures!

here's the dress i bought kerly for her birthday. i also got grey leggings. i cannot wait to dress my kids hahaha.

i'll be at church for the weekend and will post on sunday.

today i realized how important it is to love first and worry about the rest later. so many times i find myself in teacher mode, where my biggest concern is how fast or efficiently we can get things done. instead of asking jose how he's doing when school starts in 2 minutes and he's still in his room, with teeth to be brushed, i ask him to please hurry up and get to school. instead of sitting with sergio to talk to him and his stuffed animals, i ask him to please be quiet so that we can have school outside. instead of giving tonio a hug, i put him in his wheelchair because it's faster if i do it.

yes, school is important. yes, getting our work done is important. but what's more important is to realize that these kids, day in and day out, lead the same life, with the same people, in the same place. when they feel that extra unconditional love, they are affirmed and know that they are valued, respected, and loved. this is why i'm here.